Well…

Why am I so paranoid lately? My gut keeps telling me something is wrong….

Am I right to be worried about her ‘net usage? is she really that cut off? Why the hell is she so defensive all the time, and seems extra critical of me? is it just hormones?

I need something to eat. Maybe that’s it. maybe.

I feel so dirty. I want to go upstairs and check her chat logs. it’s eating at me. But that’s an invasion of privacy, and if I’m wrong……..

About Kevin Sonney

Kevin Sonney - who, contrary to popular opinion was NOT raised by wolves - grew up in central North Carolina. He fell into the technology field by accident in 1991, when he gave up the wild and crazy lifestyle of an on-air AM radio DJ to become a mundane technical support monkey. The technology industry has never really recovered from this. Kevin has worked for such names as IBM, Red Hat, webslingerZ, and Lulu Technologies (we won't mention the ones that didn't survive the experience). He currently works as a Linux Administrator for Apptio. In his spare time he rescues stray animals and plays video games with his two sons. His wife, we're sad to say, helps him get past the really hard bits. Kevin is still not very mundane, he just got better at hiding it.
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4 Responses to Well…

  1. ex_redsonja442 says:

    If you think something is wrong, it probably is. Even if you didn’t know what signals you picked up on, your brain still put it together for you.

    I’ve learned the hard way time and again to *never* ignore my instincts, even when they seem ridiculous and no one believes me at the time.

    Do what you think is right, but in your place, I’d do a little snooping around. In certain situations I’m far more interested in protecting myself and getting at the truth than I am in taking the moral high ground.

    I wish you the best, man, I hope all this gets resolved for you.

  2. catherine says:

    Ya, it’s an invastion of privacy, but I would SO be all over it if I suspected something wrong. I wouldn’t be able to help myself. The doubt would eat me up anyway. Just try not to get caught…that’s all. If there’s nothing…then you feel better. If there is something, then you need to confront it and make it better somehow.

  3. alchemist says:

    I’d have to live with myself, and the knowledge that I didn’t trust her. Which is worse than finding something – if I find nothing, it means I’ve screwed myself, and compromised on those things that i really believe in.

    Could you live with yourself if you poked into Alan’s stuff anf found out *GASP* it’s nothing to worry about? I couldn’t. I’d rather get screwed over than break that trust.

    The fact that I considered doing it is bad enough. Actually going through with it would have been unforgiveable. I have to forgive myself for considering doing something that, were it done to me, I would have huge issues with.

  4. catherine says:

    Well, that’s where we’re different. I’d be relieved to have found nothing, and would be much happier and most likely, much more pleasant to be around.

    If I doubted something, knowing me, it’s because 2 and 2 weren’t adding up anymore and I’d have to investigate. Yes, I could very much live with myself. If I were to ignore it, I could not.

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