1374

Frustration gives way to anger
Anger gives way to depression
Depression gives way to sadness
Sadness gives way to rational thought
Rational thought gives way to action.

I know what I must do. I’m not particularly happy about it, but in order to create a greater happiness, I may have to suffer some temporary unhappiness.

We will go to the beach and have fun. And when we get home, if the pattern returns to the status quo, I will do what needs to be done. I still hold out the hope that before it comes to that, things will resolve themselves without me having to be the agent of change.

I will seek the counsel of friends and family (who know the score) before doing anything, though. But at least I’ve figured out what I need to do if it comes to that.

And I am not happy with the path that lays before me.

About Kevin Sonney

Kevin Sonney - who, contrary to popular opinion was NOT raised by wolves - grew up in central North Carolina. He fell into the technology field by accident in 1991, when he gave up the wild and crazy lifestyle of an on-air AM radio DJ to become a mundane technical support monkey. The technology industry has never really recovered from this. Kevin has worked for such names as IBM, Red Hat, webslingerZ, and Lulu Technologies (we won't mention the ones that didn't survive the experience). He currently works as a Linux Administrator for Apptio. In his spare time he rescues stray animals and plays video games with his two sons. His wife, we're sad to say, helps him get past the really hard bits. Kevin is still not very mundane, he just got better at hiding it.
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5 Responses to 1374

  1. ryeth says:

    Are you talking about the removal of the computers or something more drastic (feel free to ignore if you think I’m prying)

  2. alchemist says:

    actaully, more a series of step by steps. removal of the computers probably comes it at about 8 or 9. her end of the DSL probably gets wacked about step 4. Right after I make some CYA moves.

    I’m thinking of it as more of an escalation path – if I ask for changes to be made, and they aren’t, there will be consequences. I’m sick as hell of the “oh, OK, I’ll do this, yes, I know it’s out of ahnd” conversation resulting in two-three days fo changem, then back to the same-old, same old.

    I had actually gotten this together in my head on Tuesday, but didn’t really say anything about it until now. After the rest of this week, I think I’m a little more resolute, and depending on how th ebeach and afterwrds goes, it may be a lot more unpleasant.

    And no, you’re not prying. but I’m not sure what level of detail i can go into online, y’know?

  3. ryeth says:

    I can certainly understand not wanting to go into details online. I wish you the best of luck, I can tell from all I’ve read that this is really tough :(

    I can’t remember if I ever mentioned it to you or not but years and years ago Doug and I went through a similar thing. I got completely obsessed with D&D. We had a group of friends (mostly single men) that would role play multiple nights a week till the wee hours, sometimes till daybreak. Once you get into the plot you don’t want to miss – and it truly did become like an addiction. Doug wasn’t involved because he worked a standard job that made him get up early during the week – so we got very little time together. Him gone during the day, me gone at night. We argued and argued about it, but I didn’t want to give it up. It wasn’t until he scared the hell out of me (he went out to the bars alone – sounds like no big deal but back then I was a very clingly jealousy freaky kinda person, just the idea that he was going to a bar alone screamed to me “he could meet a girl to fill his time with” – and that sobered me up to I’ve got to change or we are going down a path that is very bad for us) and even then it was difficult, but I was able to let it go eventually. So I understand what you are going through, from both sides regrettably. It’s like any other addiction, she won’t stop craving it until she is actually away from it and away long enough that it’s no longer a habit and she’s no longer, as she sees it, an intregal part. And even then she has to want to stop it, because if all she recalls is the fun she had she’ll want to get back into it. It’s amazing that something as simple as games can do that to us. *sigh*

  4. alchemist says:

    It’s interesting – it’s like I go through phases where I don’t want to have to bother with it, and work around it, then it’s just too much and it’s got to go.

    It’s like it builds up, I vent, and it gets better for a little bit, then it goes back to normal.

    I dunno. We’ll see how it goes at the beach, and if the prolonged lack of escapism (and that’s what it is for her – pure, unadulterated escapism) does anything.

    Worst case, she turns into a super-bitch for the later half of the week and I have to deal with that. And if she does get to that level, I have no issues telling her off *grin*

  5. detritus says:

    I haven’t even heard of RO until you started mentioning it so forgive this potentially stupid question:

    Is this something that would also work over a dial-up? I’m wondering if chunking the DSL would just mean she switches to the phone line.

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